Call my name.
Call my name, he repeated.
And again, and again, and again, non-stop.
Call my name.
The atmosphere was dark and dense, my head weighed heavily, I could lift it if I really tried, but my neck was in so much pain i couldn’t hold it for long. I was lying somewhere, I could barely feel my own arms, they were numb and I did not have the strength to raise them.
Call my name, the voice repeated.
The voice seemed to go away momentarily, but it always came back, sometimes it took a few minutes, once it must have taken an entire hour, but it always returned. My legs must have been the only thing I could feel clearly, but the pain was unbearable, thighs, shins, hip, every lower part of my body twisted in agony, but strangely, it gave me some relief, at least I knew they were still there.
Call my name.
Strong lights obstructed my vision, with red and orange tones, it was by far the most disturbing thing to me, if this state of complete disorientation was not enough punishment, the lack of sight was a morbid icing on the cake. I tried to scream as hard as I could, but despite the effort, no sound came out of my mouth, crying was also not an option, there were no tears left.
Call my name, he said, this time closer.
Most of the time I’ve been here, I felt cold, except when the voice approached. It was a surge of heat that burned my skin as something pressed me, my senses were everywhere, I could not make out what it was, but it felt horrible. Random pains came up through my body as the strange lights changed color, red, purple, yellow, and then white.
Call my name.
It was what I heard when I woke up, every brief moment of lucidity was pure horror, I must have gone crazy, this is some sick sanatorium and they will not even let me see, please, I just want to see.
Call my name, he said again.
Time passed without any sense, could have been a day or forty, there was no way to know, my memories were also shuffled, couldn’t even remember my goddamn name. But in spite of everything, I didn’t give up. I tried to go back to anything that kept me sane, my husband, by the gods, I missed him so much, my disoriented mind made his face into just a concept, no matter how hard I tried to remember.
Call my name, the voice said.
After hearing his damn voice again, I decided to do something, I was not sure what, but I had to try something. Despite the distortion of the lights, I tried my best to focus on my arms, I noticed that there was something in my wrists, maybe the reason why they were mostly numb. That’s when it hit me, my teeth, at least for the most part, were still with me.
Call my name, I heard.
I tried to wait a while, can’t even tell if it was seconds or minutes, but I waited, and in an surge, I lift my left arm as much as I could, and threw my body to it and bit that thing on my wrist. The texture was strange, it looked like leather and fabric, so I chewed it like a dog, over and over, until finally, my arm was free.
Call my name, I heard again, and a shiver ran down my spine.
I stood still, my heart was racing, I could not think of anything, just waited to hear the voice again, I waited to see what it would do to me. It seemed to have been a little distant, it was not exactly unusual for it to happen, but it could just be my mind playing tricks on me. I did not feel any immediate reaction, and imbued with a courage I didn’t even know I had, I just kept going.
Call my name, I heard in a distance again.
I untied my right arm, a sense of freedom came to me, but I knew it would not end there, instantly I covered my eyes, and for the first time, the lights didn’t reach me. I sat there, running my hands through my legs, every touch felt like a punch, they were bloody and sore. It was hard to know if they could get me up.
Call my name, I heard, and for the first time, the sound of footsteps followed.
I pulled my hand away from my eyes just enough to see the lower part, trying to make sense of where I was, some sort of tiny room, so small that the four walls were in arms reach. Lights were nailed to the four corners and the ceiling, they were absurdly bright, any small glimpse was enough to make me dizzy.
Call my name, the voice came from behind the door.
The door was at the foot of the bed, but there was nothing I could do if he came in, so I grabbed the first thing I could, I reached one of the lights on the wall, it felt kind of like a candle, but with a strong material, it was warm and had a sharper spot, it was enough. I tried to stand beside the bed, an imediate pain in my waste took hold, I almost screamed, so tried to focus on something else, my husband, the chance to be with him again.
Call my name, and the door opened.
I attacked him like a maniac, he did not seem to be expecting it, and the sound of my screams were no bigger than his as I stabbed his neck, blood splatered on my face as I pushed him desperately, my eyes tried to adjust to the new environment, it was a small, dark hut. In that moment of desperation, I managed to focus briefly, the moonlight came through a window and indicated the door as a gift, and I would accept it.
Call… My… Name.
He said gagging in blood, and I ran to the door, each step, every encounter of the skin on my feet with the cold and musty wood felt like I was stepping in a hundred needles. I didn’t even know where I got the strength to not just fall flat on my face. I threw myself against the door, hoping it would open at the same time, but it didn’t, it was locked.
Call… My name, he said, trying to get closer.
I hit the door repeatedly, screaming for help, begging for anyone to hear me, there was no response. He struggled between the cabin furniture, one hand clutching his neck, the other pointed directly at me, at least I think, my sight did me no favors. Finding a point of balance, he raced to me in a raging onslaught, completely blinded by hatred. So I threw myself out of the way.
CALL MY NAME
That’s what he screamed before he hit the door with all his might. It cracked open abruptly, presenting him with the stairs and mud soon after. I stood up with extreme difficulty, holding myself against the wall, I looked out of the hut and saw a piece of bone stick out of his neck, and blood, lots of blood. My eyes finally seemed to adjust, the moonlight showed me the truth, the face of the one who held me for all this time.
His name was James, and he was my husband.